This Weekend Was Rough

Just as the title says, this weekend was a rough one. Since I'm so lazy awesome I'm going to talk about it in list form.

• The medications I'm on have turned my eating habits a total 180. I've been constantly nauseous for a full week and it's really taking its toll on me. I don't know if this is what the medications are supposed to do or if I'm just having a funny reaction to them, but I can't seem to eat a full meal anymore. My dietitian told me to eat three full meals a day, but since I can't seem to stomach more than an apple at a time, I've taken more to snacking throughout the day. This usually isn't a problem while I'm at home, but at work, it's hard to know what I'll feel like eating. I'll pack a lunch and when it's time to eat, I'll want to eat everything except for what I brought. It's kind of a pain in the butt.  
• Monday (yesterday,) I started randomly spotting. Usually this wouldn't worry me, but it was smack dab in the middle of a birth control cycle. I'm not supposed to start the placebo pills until Sunday and even then, it takes my body a day or two to get things going. Again, I don't know if this is a side effect of the meds, or if something was wrong. It seems to have tapered off for now, but if it happens again, I'm thinking of giving my doctor a call. 
• Along with the spotting, I had (what I think are) the cramps from hell. Normally the first day of my period I have bad cramps, but nothing a Midol or heating pad won't take care of. These were pains that I've never felt before. They were bad all day and then kept waking me up at night. Just like the spotting, they're gone now, but sheesh that was horrible. 
• For the last 3 weeks or so, I've been having stabbing pains in my lower abdomen. I have no idea what they are from. I'm *thinking* they might be from cysts, but since it hasn't been confirmed that I even have cysts, I can't say for sure that that's what it is. I have another appointment on the 18th including an ultrasound to see if there are cysts present, so hopefully that'll provide an answer. 
• I'm not going to lie, in the middle of one seriously bad nausea spell, I seriously questioned if it's all worth it. Is it really worth me being nauseous for a year? Is it worth paying for the pills? Is it worth the headache of having to count every calorie and carb? I remember looking at Keegan and asking him to knock me up now (not that it would have worked...) so that I wouldn't have to go through all of this. With a clear head today, I realize, of course it's all worth it. Being a mom has been something that I've wanted to do since I was a little girl. Raising a child (or two..or three) to be a wonderful, smart, beautiful, contributing human has been a life goal of mine. I'm sure as soon as I see those two pink lines, I'll forget everything that we've had to go through. Of course it's worth it. It just sucks right now.